October 2009 Communique
Communique - CNDR's Newsletter
October 2009
Negotiation Tip: How to Imagine Their Internal Conflict Story
By Grande Lum, originally published in the Huffington Post
When you are in conflict with another person, step back and imagine what that person's internal conflicts are.Under stress, you are more likely to see the other person as offensive. Your fears fill the vacuum of their unseen motivation and mutate them into their diabolical intentions. To you, the other person is rigid and inflexible while you are open-minded and flexible.
However just as for you, more is going on beneath the surface for them. You will likely never know their internal conflict with certainty. Your assessment may be wrong. When you really know the other person you will have a lot more to go on.
Remember that another person has a positive intention. The external result may be extremely negative, but the underlying justification and rationalization is usually positive in the other person's mind. Focusing on their internal conflicts rather than their difficult external behavior gives you more constructive choices. Access the mental picture of that person as fuller than the one dimensional way they now appear to you.
For example, I remember letting a longtime business partner know that I had received a job offer from a client. I did so with a desire to be as honest and forthcoming with a longtime friend and colleague. He loudly accused me of "betrayal" and "disloyalty." He demanded I give a full report of any communication with the party and that no documents should be exchanged without his reviewing. I was angrier with him than I had ever been, having felt I had done nothing wrong and felt that I was being perceived unfairly. Only when I reflected on his history, one in which he had felt walked over by previous employees and partners, did I soften and recognize this was raising lingering conflicts for him. This helped in our ensuing conversation from my becoming ballistic and allowed us to talk through the situation. I still shared my frustration, but in a more a constructive way than I would have otherwise.
If you do not know the person as well, suspend dislike to imagine their inner conflict. Hold out the possibility of a struggle going on for the other person. What is the other person struggling with? What is their back-story? What are you triggering in the person? When you appreciate the fullness of their struggle and yours, your conflict management approach expands from one-dimensional to three dimensional.
The next post will focus on how to enter tense situations. Being prepared for difficult situations means not just knowing the issue, but being as relaxed and comfortable as possible.
The man who has no imagination has no wings. -- Muhammad Ali
Hastings Joins the University Network for Collaborative Governance
CNDR has had a longstanding interest in collaborative governance. In 2008, Hastings CNDR and Center for State and Local Government Law sponsored a symposium on the topic. So it should come as no surprise that Hastings CNDR recently joined the University Network for Collaborative Governance (UNCG), hosted by the Policy Consensus Initiative at Portland State University. “We wanted to take this interest to the next level – to be a neutral forum for California public issues – There’s clearly a need for constructive dialogue that leads to tangible results in this state,” said CNDR Director Grande Lum.
The Network was launched in April 2008, after leaders from nine universities came together to talk about how their long term needs for sharing knowledge, information, and best practices could be met. The Network is an informal, unincorporated organization consisting of centers and programs in colleges and universities that engage in service and scholarship in order to enable citizens and their leaders to engage in dialogue, discussion, problem solving, and conflict resolution around public issues. The Network promotes and champions the role universities and their centers play as neutral forums and resources for collaborative governance.
Objectives of the Network include advancing teaching, research and outreach in public deliberation, collaborative problem solving and multi-party conflict resolution; assisting universities in shaping and adapting their research, teaching, and community engagement to enhance their effectiveness; acquainting university leaders, policymakers, and the public with the role universities can play in carrying out collaborative governance practices; and promoting policies that support the use of best practices and systems for collaborative governance.
Currently, the Network’s membership numbers 30 programs, including at Hamline University, the University of Virginia, and the University of Washington. The Steering Committee, which is selected by voting representatives from member organizations, is responsible for overall policy and direction. The Network offers a variety of tools for governmental leaders, university centers and practitioners such as a database of public policy case studies highlighting the value of collaborative practices in state government and of videos illustrating collaborative processes at work in various states. In addition, the Network provides guidelines for best practices, quality assurance, and how to introduce and initiate a collaborative process.
California Dispute Resolution Council Policy Conference
CNDR will be co-sponsoring the California Dispute Resolution Council’s (CDRC) 16th Annual Dispute Resolution Policy Conference, held at Hastings on Saturday, October 17th. CDRC is a statewide, non-profit organization whose membership consists of commercial and non-commercial ADR neutrals, providers and educators. One of its missions is to develop, support and influence legislation and public policies promoting effective and accessible conflict resolution services.
CDRC has been promoting effective, accessible conflict resolution services statewide since March 1994. Supported almost entirely by membership dues, it has established a reputation for influential, principled advocacy aimed at supporting policy that is good for both consumers and providers of ADR services. CDRC is the voice of ADR in Sacramento.
Included in the morning program will be a comprehensive review of the status of recent proposed legislation affecting ADR practice by lobbyist Donne Brownsey. The keynote address will be from Assembly Member Bill Monning, who was elected in November 2008 to represent the 27th District, including portions of Monterey, Santa Cruz and Santa Clara Counties. Monning came to ADR through his post law school work as the Executive Director of the Nobel Peace Prize winning organization, the International Physicians for the Prevention of Nuclear War. It was there and through his work with Roger Fisher, that he was exposed to interest based negotiation. His interest deepened in ADR more broadly in both theory and practice to include working in mediation and arbitration. Prior to his service in the State Assembly, Monning was a Professor at the Monterey College of Law and a Professor of International Negotiation and Conflict Resolution at the Monterey Institute of International Studies.
The afternoon program will have several breakout sessions including This is Your Brain on Mediation (an overview of relevant findings from cutting edge neuro-science and an introduction to neurolinguistic programming); Arbitration: It’s Better, Faster, and , uh – did we mention it’s Better and Faster? (a panel discussion amongst arbitration providers, lawyers and neutrals about what they have done to control the cost of arbitration); The Wide New World of Collaborative Law (a full report on the draft Uniform Collaborative Law Act and the multiple uses of the collaborative process in the fields of probate and labor law as well as family law); What’s the Problem? An Exploration of the Analytical Frameworks Mediators, Lawyers and Parties Bring to the Mediation Table (panelists include Richard Collier, Jessica Notini, Michael Dickstein and Mark Lehocky); Arbitration in the Motion Picture Industry (providing an insider’s guide to what parties should know about how arbitration is used to resolve disputes in the motion picture industry); and 1,000 Flowers Bloom: A Glimpse at the use of Dispute Resolution Processes in the Larger World Outside Litigation (an introduction to areas in which mediation and meditative methodologies are utilized to help people outside the stereotypical legal dispute context).
To register for this engaging and informative conference, visit CDRC Annual Policy Conference.
Student Spotlight: Emily Chan
Catching up with 3L Emily Chan is a challenge. She is involved in so many activities on top of a standard course load, one wonders how she does it all. This semester alone she is TA-ing for Appellate Advocacy, working as the production editor for the Constitutional Law Quarterly, serving on both the Moot Court and the Negotiation Team Boards, preparing for the Nationals Moot Court Competition hosted at Hastings this November, and just recently completed the Negotiation Team’s “Negotiation Boot Camp” as a board member, making presentations and assisting new members with their negotiation skills.
Emily grew up in Benecia, CA as the middle child in her family. Rather than being the mediator, she grew adept at advocating for herself within her family. This prepared her well for Moot Court! She acknowledges that being on the Negotiation Team has helped her to be more calm and selective in what she says to her family, and therefore more effective in her advocacy. She was a competitive figure skater through high school, and now skates recreationally. She went to Cal for her undergraduate work, majoring in Business Administration and Rhetoric. From Cal, she went straight to Hastings, stating that Hastings was the best choice for her. “Hastings has more than just Bar classes; I have the opportunity to gain practical skills and to explore legal areas that won’t necessarily be on the exam.”
Emily has enjoyed much success on both the Moot Court and Negotiation Teams. She won Best Oral Advocate at Hastings’ Snodgrass Moot Court Competition. She went on to compete at the Wagner National Labor and Employment Law Moot Court Competition last year, claiming Best Preliminary Round Team, 3rd Best Brief and Best Oral Advocate. Emily’s team made it to the quarter finals. On the Negotiation Team, Emily competed at the ABA Regional Negotiation Competition in San Diego, and then went on to win 2nd place team and 6th place mediator at the National Law School Mediation Tournament in Chicago.
In addition to her classes and extra-curricular activities, Emily has been working part-time with solo practitioner Gene Takagi, who does non-profit and transactional law. Emily has really enjoyed working with Gene, and has learned that although she may not know exactly what she wants to do with her career after Hastings, she knows that she wants to work with “good people who are ethical and grounded.” Emily and Gene wrote an article for ABA Business Law Today entitled, “Alternatives to Forming a Charitable Nonprofit.” Read the article.
Favorite professors at Hastings? “Professor Diamond is very animated and made Criminal Law fun and light hearted. Gary Watt, who taught Appellate Advocacy, is one of the most dedicated professors I’ve seen. He puts as much into the class as he asks of the students. He gave personalized feedback, was very accessible (something you don’t hear often about professors) and was a great resource.”
Highlights of her time at Hastings? “I’ve loved the personal connection I’ve found on the Negotiation Team – we’re like family! There is such a huge investment on the part of CNDR in terms of support and giving us the backbone to recognize and utilize our personal styles. This is evidenced by how many people come back to the team.”
CNDR Unveils New Brochure
CNDR’s collaborative journey to develop and produce a brochure began almost a year ago, when the Center held a visioning retreat with all of its faculty, adjuncts and staff. In addition to discussing new education and public interest programs, one of the ideas that came out of the retreat was to develop a brochure that illustrates and promotes the Center’s accomplishments and mission. CNDR ultimately selected Irene Nelson Design, based in Piedmont, CA, to make the Center’s vision real.
Director Grande Lum, Faculty Chair Melissa Nelken, Professor Clark Freshman, and Academic Program Coordinator Jolynn Jones brainstormed themes and content in March. Upon receiving the three-page memo from the brainstorming session, Irene went to work on the design. Synthesizing the information given to her, Irene developed a design that is driven by beautiful portraits of individuals – faculty, students, alumni and staff – reflecting different aspects of the Center, its diversity, and Hastings’ enviable setting in the heart of the San Francisco Bay Area.
Photographer Jim Block worked over the summer to capture the images, choosing such places as the Asian Art Museum, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals, Golden Gate Park, and the Mission District to adorn each portrait. As Mark Twain supposedly said, “The coldest winter I ever saw was the summer I spent in San Francisco,” many of the subjects had to brave cold and windy days for their photo shoots (not to mention Jim’s sense of humor).
Finally, the text came together as various people contributed writing, editing and proofing. The result is a beautiful 20-page brochure that highlights the Center’s achievements, individuals, and ongoing mission. The Center is indebted to so many who not only have made CNDR a thought and practice leader in the field of dispute resolution, but who also devoted their time and energy toward the production of the brochure. View the brochure.